Currently: Trying not to lose my mind!

Current mood: restless
Let's start this with the crazy dreams I've been having. I think they came on because I've been getting my fill of super hero movies, but these are crazy to the point where I am actually crying or screaming in my sleep. Last night, for example, I had a dream that I had morphed into a giant falcon and started to fly ferociously. Wind was picking up, and I could feel the power of my wings lifting me into the air. I started to screech, and as I started screeching I started to shake. Then I woke up to Jes shaking me awake. She said I was screaming and moving the bed. Apparently I took this dream very seriously. Of course I felt like I didn't get enough sleep, because who could get rested sleep after being a giant falcon.

Current movie: The Avengers
I literally can't get enough of these super heroes! Seriously though. I found out that Jes has never seen any super hero movies, so instead of divorcing her, I'm making her watch all them. She is actually impressed on how they all tie together. She really likes Iron Man and I hope we can get through all these movies! It's actually kind of exciting to watch them all over again, or least to have a reason to.

Current book: My own
Let me tell you how much of a roller coaster ride this book has been for me! I have been writing it for almost two years now. I have put a lot of love, sweat and tears into it. Now I'm at the point where all the action is getting added and I'm super excited when I'm writing. I'm hoping that it flows the way I want it to. I'm going to be spending a lot more time on getting it finished than I have in the past. I want my manuscript done and ready for submission and I hope it doesn't kill me in the process. I hope to be published in the next year or so. I'd really love to share it here with you guys someday to.

Current TV: Doctor Who
I know the new season hasn't started yet, but I seriously can't wait for it to come back on. I'm watching reruns of the last season just so I remember what happened. I also like to throw in some oldies from my favorite Doctor. I know you Whovians out there do it too! My favorite Doctor is number 9. Hearing him say Fantastic gives me chills! I wish he could have gone longer, but oh well. Oh! I ordered Tardis cupcake molds and I can't wait to get them here so I can make tardis' cupcakes and post about them!  

Current truth: Weight 
About 3 years ago I made this post Proud of my size and it felt great. Today I sit here and write this and feel horrible. During my short stay in Jersey I lost 30 lbs, and somehow gained it all back. I'm trying to stay positive, but it feels like I'm falling back into that mindset of negativity. My clothes fit just fine, but when I look in the mirror I feel very disappointed in myself. I really don't eat alot, and I practically starved myself when I lost all that weight. I really think this is the way my body wants to be. I'm tired of fighting this pointless fight anyway. I need to remember to love and forgive myself. Life is too short to be worrying about this nonsense. I do need to mention though, it doesn't help when you're married to someone who is the perfect size by society's standards.

Current hair: Brown
Did I mention My hair is brown?
I cut all my hair off and dyed it brown. In all honesty I hate it. I'm going to grow my hair long again and when this brown lightens, I'm going to add some purple undertones to it. Life is much more fun with color anyway.

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